Title: B & B Weekend 17-18
Author: Gileswench
Contact: gileswench@yahoo.com
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue.



Ethan returned to his room to find Olivia sitting on the bed, drink in hand, and an empty suitcase by her side.

"I thought you were leaving."

"I needed a drink. I'll be gone soon enough."

"Actually, if you leave today, you'll miss all the fun."

"What fun?"

"Oh, haven't you heard? It's all over the place. Ripper's marrying his little Slayer tomorrow out in the garden. It's all anybody can talk about."

Olivia's hand shook as she lifted her glass. "You can't be serious."

"As a heart attack, Liv. Just think of all the fun we could have if we stay for the festivities. I imagine there are a few things Ripper hasn't bothered to tell his lady love about his shady past. We could tell her all about them."

"I don't want to hurt him."

"Then hurt her. Lord knows you've ammunition enough. Not to mention the fact that you'd be on hand to comfort your dear, old lover afterwards. Come on! Chaos, Liv! A splendid time is guaranteed for....well, for both of us, anyway. So shall we?" He grinned with an ecstatic glint in his eye.

*****

Buffy and Giles both started at the knock on the door.

"Um, just a moment," Giles called as Buffy scrambled to gather her clothes from the floor and raced to the bathroom. He quickly pulled on his jeans and a tee shirt before answering.

Hank took note of his future son-in-laws' dishevilment. Giles hair defied gravity, his shirt was untucked, his feet bare, and his glasses askew.

"Did I interrupt something?" He asked somewhat sheepishly.

"No, no, not at all." The Englishman resettled his glasses as he lied through his teeth. He surreptitiously kicked Buffy's bra under the bed, praying her father hadn't seen it.

Hank smiled at Giles for the first time. "At least I can see you won't be able to put one over on Buffy. Has anyone ever told you you're a terrible liar?"

"It's been said." Giles replied wryly.

"Well, I'll get out of your hair. I just wanted to let you and Buffy know that Judge Alice Hawkins will be here tomorrow at three p.m. to perform the wedding. Let Buffy know I kept at least one promise."

"Thank you, I will. This will mean a great deal to her."

"I'm still not happy about this whole thing, but I can't stop it. I might as well try to be helpful. Welcome to the family, Rupert."

Hank stuck out his hand and Giles took it in an unnecessarily firm handshake. He knew Hank was trying to make amends, but it was hard not to be angry with the man who had caused Buffy so much grief.

"What was it you said you do for a living again?" Hank had to know.

"I own a small shop in Sunnydale. Magic supplies."

"No kidding." Hank looked distinctly nervous. "Well, I'd better get back to Crystal. You can tell Buffy it's all right to come out of the bathroom now." He left quickly.

As soon as he was gone, a blonde head peeked out of the bathroom. "Busted, huh?"

"Your father seems to have...er...gotten a clue since yesterday."

"Rupert! You used a current turn of phrase!"

"'Turn of phrase'? Since when do you talk like that?"

Buffy flopped on the bed in mock despair. "We're rubbing off on each other! We're doomed!"

Giles flopped beside her. "There's nothing for it, luv. We'll just have to quarantine ourselves from the rest of the world. It might be catching."

"Quarantine, huh? What do we do while we're all cut off from civilization?"

"I'm sure we'll come up with something."

They were both laughing as he kissed her.

*****

"Cordelia, does it occur to you that neither one of us has called Angel to let him know that Buffy and Giles are in no immediate danger?"

"Do you want to be the one to tell him what's going on? 'Cause I sure don't."

"It was your vision, so you should be the one to tell him."

"That's right. Put it all on my shoulders. As if I don't have enough to do."

"Well it's hardly my responsibility that we came here in the first place."

"Hey, I never asked you to come along."

"Cordelia, why are we fighting?"

"Duh, braintrust, it's what we do."

"Why do we do it, I wonder?"

The girl thought for a moment. "Is this a trick question?"

"Not to be crude, but we only seem to be capable of fighting and, well, fucking."

"What are you saying? Are you breaking up with me already?"

"No, no, you've misunderstood me. I don't want to leave you. But I would like to find some...common ground, if you will. We're going to need it if this is to last."

"Like what?"

"Anything we have in common will do. For instance, do you like Angel?"

"Yeah. He's broody, but he's not bad. Except when he's all Grr."

"See, we have something already. Let's see if we can find another, shall we?"

"Wesley, playing twenty questions is not the way to a good relationship. Look, I'll make it simple: would you rather fight with me or agree with anyone else?"

"Fight with you."

"See, that's another thing we have in common." She draped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. "let's just tell Angel when we get back. It's only until tomorrow night, and I don't want him brooding alone. There are stakes all over that office."

"Ah, I quite see your point. Perhaps it would be best to wait, at that. He and I could talk, man-to-man, over a cup of tea."

Cordelia giggled as she pulled him close again. "You goof, only you would do the tea and sympathy thing with a vampire."

*****

Buffy and Giles finally emerged from their room to take a walk by the lake. They teased and laughed as they walked so that neither of them realized they weren't alone until Ethan and Olivia were upon them.

"Well, well, well, look who we have here, Liv. It's the happy couple. I hear congratulations are in order. We're thrilled, of course."

"Ethan" Giles growled. "I trust you'll both be long gone before the wedding."

It wasn't a question.

"Now Ripper, is that any way to talk to your old mate? I was rather hoping you'd need a best man."

"I've got a best man, and I don't need a worst man, so piss off."

"Now, now, Ripper, not in front of the ladies. Hardly the act of a gentleman, is that?"

"Don't worry about me, Ethan. I can take care of myself." Buffy wanted to say a lot more, but held back for Giles' sake. She felt her fiancé's hands on her shoulders, and knew he wanted her to stay out of this as much as possible.

"I feel very sure of that, my dear." Ethan managed to make his words sound dirty.

"Ethan," Olivia warned.

"Oh, but you don't really need to take care of yourself, do you Buffy? Not as long as you've got the Ripper. He's good, isn't he?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Buffy, let's go." Giles was determined to get away as quickly as possible. "He's not talking about anything." He gave a significant glare to Ethan.

"Now Ripper, you were never that shy before. Not back in the day. At any rate, you never denied taking someone to bed before."

"I know about Olivia. That's over. It doesn't matter."

"Buffy, please." Giles tried to move her but she shook his hand away.

"No. I want to know what Ethan's talking about."

Ethan gave Giles a shocked look. "You really never told her?" He leaned close to Buffy and whispered conspiratorially "Did you think Olivia was his only ex-lover on the premises?"

He leaned back to see the effect of his question. Buffy stood trembling with rage.

"I don't believe you."

"Ask your precious Rupert, then. He's honest when questioned directly, at any rate. He never could tell a lie to save his soul."

She turned to face Giles. "Is this true?"

"Buffy, you must understand..." he began.

"Is it?"

He met her eyes as he answered. "Yes. But..."

"I don't want to hear it. Not now." She whirled around and punched Ethan hard in the stomach. "And I don't ever want to see you again." she told him as he clutched his gut in pain. "Because if I do, I will kill you." She marched off in a fury.

Giles watched her leave. His heart ached and his blood boiled. There was only one way to relieve his feelings. He kicked Ethan in the kidneys.

"You'd best listen to her, you bastard, because the only way Buffy will kill you is if I don't get to you first. I wish you joy of him, Olivia." With one final kick, Giles left the scene as well.

Olivia looked at Ethan lying in a pained heap on the ground. "I hope you enjoyed that, Ethan. They may have ruptured something between the two of them."

Strangely, Ethan's moans turned to a shaky, shallow laughter.

"Yes, they may have done. But did you see, Liv? Just for a moment, he was my Ripper."

*****

Buffy was sitting on the bed swiping angrily at the tears that insisted on running down her cheeks when Giles quietly entered the room. He made no attempt to move closer, just stood in the doorway with his hands in his pockets and a rueful expression.

The only indication Buffy gave that she had noticed his presence was a question.

"Would you ever have told me? If I hadn't found out."

Giles sighed before replying. "Probably not, no."

"Why?"

"Because, frankly, I didn't consider it to be any of your business. I have no intention of explaining every sexual encounter I've had in my life."

"But this was Ethan Rayne. The guy who keeps making our lives miserable. Did you really think he'd never say anything?"

"I had hoped. He's taken to being militantly heterosexual, so I suppose I thought he wouldn't want to embarrass himself. I hadn't counted on his need to make us suffer. I'm sorry, Buffy. It was a miscalculation on my part."

"Doing it with Ethan, or not telling me?"

"Both, I suppose. Not telling you, definitely."

"When was it, anyway?"

"When do you think? Buffy, it's been more than twenty years. Long before Randall's death."

"So are you going to be joining Willow at the gay pride parade?"

"Hardly. You know how I feel about crowds. Buffy, I should have told you about this long ago, but I honestly thought it wouldn't come up. I should have known better. And you deserve to know the truth about me. I'm bisexual."

"Y'know, that little confession might have had more impact if I hadn't found out about you screwing a man first."

"I'm deeply sorry, Buffy. I only hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

"So what does this mean for us? Would you be wanting to bring strange men home?"

"If you'll still have me, I can promise that will never happen. I would never be unfaithful to you. You are the only person I want to be with, man or woman."

She considered for a moment. "So I won't come home after patrol to find you chasing Xander around the bedroom?"

Giles relaxed, realizing that she was teasing him. "I promise you, Xander is perfectly safe from me. However, if David Bowie wants my body, all bets are off."

"I can accept that. As long as you know that the same goes for me, substituting John Cusack for David Bowie. And has anyone ever told you you have lousy taste in men?"

"John Cusack has flabby cheeks."

"David Bowie's too skinny."

They melted into one anothers' arms as Giles rained kisses on Buffy's upturned face. Both groaned at the knock on the door. Giles gave his fiancee one last kiss before answering the rapping.

"Cordelia, what brings you here?"

"We need to talk about sleeping arrangements for tonight."

"What on Earth are you talking about?"

"Giles! I thought you were all into traditions and stuff. Don't you know it's bad luck for the bride and groom to see each other before the ceremony on their wedding day?"

"Yes, I have heard of that nonsense, and I don't care to believe it."

"Besides, we have to go down and get the license together, so we have to see each other then. I don't think the traditional way works for us."

"But you'll have really bad luck and you already live on the Hellmouth. How much more bad luck do you guys need?"

"We'll chance it, Cordy. Besides, you and Wes need some smoochie time too."

"Yeah, well, don't blame me if all kinds of ishy things happen later because of this. I tried."

"And we appreciate it beyond words. Now go." Giles wanted to be alone with Buffy.

"Oh, and before I leave, Buffy, I brought along this moisturizer. It works in a hurry, so if you use it tonight, you won't look so dry in the morning. Oh, and you should put cucumber slices on your eyes tonight. They're all puffy. You're going to be a beautiful bride if it kills me. And I'll do your hair and makeup, too."

"Thanks, Cordy. Now go away. We need our beauty sleep."

"That's for sure." She hugged them both. "I really, really hope you guys are happy." With a final wave she was out the door.

PART 18

Buffy awoke the next morning when Giles kissed her softly.

"Good morning, luv. Happy wedding day."

She snuggled closer, reveling in the feel of his arms around her.

"Mmmmm, morning. I think I like the idea of waking up every day just like this."

"So do I, but when the baby comes, we're more likely to be woken much earlier by screams from the nursery."

"Gee, way to make parenthood sound appealing."

He chuckled quietly. "Merely being realistic, my dear."

"This is not the day for it, Rupert. Today is about happily ever after."

"Happily ever after is reality for us."

"I love you, mushy guy."

"I love you, too."

*****

Cordelia prodded Wesley in the ribs. "Come on, Wes; get up."

The gentleman in question shrieked quietly and flinched. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Clueless much? Waking you up so we can take care of all the little details. Don't you want this wedding to be perfect?"

"Since it isn't mine, I frankly don't much care."

"Don't be silly. Angel will want to know everything was perfect for Buffy, so we have to make sure it is."

"She's marrying Giles." he reminded her.

"So?"

"So, as long as it isn't interrupted by demons, she'll probably consider it perfect no matter what happens."

Cordelia gawked at her lover. "When did you get to be such a romantic?"

"I always have been. You just never noticed."

*****

"Xander, stop the car. I forgot..."

"Nothing, Anya. You forgot nothing. I'm not turning around again. You have your dress, that damn magazine, a present for Buffy and Giles, all the stuff you need for the protection spell, a bottle of water, and a bag of Doritos. What the hell else do you need?"

"I forgot to put up the sign on the Magic Box. The one that says we're closed today."

Xander sighed. "You realize at this rate they'll be halfway home before we get on the road. Okay, we'll go put it up, and then we'll Kerouac."

"Huh?"

"Kerouac. Jack. He wrote a book called..."

"Yeah, yeah, all I know is he treated women like dirt. I could've set up shop just avenging his wrongs. All of those Beat guys were really weird. But their wives and girlfriends, well, of the ones that liked girls, would never actually make the damn wishes. A real waste, if you ask me."

"And I'm suddenly feeling motivated to get rid of my entire Kerouac collection. Here we are." He pulled up in front of the shop and Anya jumped out of the car. Once inside, she taped a sign that read: GO AWAY. WE ARE NOT OPEN TODAY. in the window and raced back out to the car.

"Now we can go." Anya smiled broadly and nodded at her boyfriend, who just smiled back. He would let Giles explain what was wrong with the sign later.

*****

"Thanks for giving us a ride, Mrs. Summers."

"That's all right, Tara. I'll enjoy having the company. It's an awfully long drive to make with just your own thoughts."

"And I'll bet those thoughts are pretty nostalgic today." Willow was smiling having reconciled herself to the idea of her best friend marrying her Watcher.

"Sometimes it's hard to believe she's all grown up. And there are other times when I wonder if she was ever really a child. Now here she's getting married, and I didn't even know for sure they were dating until she called to say they were engaged."

"But it's gonna be all right. I mean, Giles is really a great guy. And Buffy's happy. I don't think I've ever heard her so happy. You're not going to do anything are you? To stop it?"

"Willow, have you ever tried to stop Buffy from doing something she wanted to? I may be crazy, but I'm no fool. Mr. Giles, on the other hand, may end up walking a little funny tonight."

*****

Buffy rose up and impaled herself on Giles, both letting out a heartfelt groan as she slid down his length. She rode him hard and fast as they kissed passionately. Since the Night of the Exploding Rubber Incident, as she liked to think of it, they hadn't bothered with the condoms again, and Buffy loved the feeling of Giles naked cock buried in her.

After several minutes, Giles knew he couldn't last much longer and flipped them over. Thrusting wildly, he petted the sweat-slicked hair from Buffy's face. She adored the way he made her feel so cherished even in their most energetic bouts of lovemaking. The combination of strength and tenderness excited her beyond anything she had ever known.

With a final deep push, both went over the edge, crying out joyfully as the spasms careened through their bodies. Giles carefully rolled them over, remaining imbedded in his lady's delicious burrow.

In between kisses, Buffy giggled.

"What's so funny? I warn you, though, if it has something to do with my performance just now, I'll be wounded to the core."

"No, you were terrific, as always. I was just thinking about what Cordy said last night, about it being bad luck to see each other today. I was just wondering if it's bad luck to thump like bunnies all day."

"Only if we lose track of time and fail to get the marriage license before the judge arrives. It might also be a good idea to be out of bed before your mother gets here."

"Yeah, she might wig a little if she found us like this. Moms don't like to see evidence of their kids sex lives. Anyway, Cordelia the beauty consultant is probably gonna walk in here any minute."

"There is one more reason to get out of bed and dressed, you know."

"What's that?"

"If we keep up at this rate, I'll have difficulty walking a straight line to the alter."

*****

The rest of the morning passed in a blur for Buffy. After breakfast, she and Giles went to City Hall and got the marriage license. When they returned, Cordelia was waiting for Buffy to do a complete makeover on her.

As Cordy moisturized, plucked, exfoliated, manicured, pedicured, and generally worked Buffy over in a cosmetic frenzy, she prattled on about details that meant very little to the bride herself.

"Cordelia, I'm just gonna leave all those decisions in your capable hands, okay? You're a whole lot better at the party thing than I am. Every one I'm involved in ends up being crashed by zombies or spirit warriors, or something. Being the undead's favorite good time gal is not all it's cracked up to be."

"At least there's one thing you won't have to worry about; Ethan Rayne took off really early this morning. Was he here all the time? And who was that woman with him?"

"He sure was. And the woman was Olivia. She and Rupert, well, they have a history too."

"No kidding. Y'know, I never thought of Giles as much of a ladies' man before. In fact, when he first showed up, I kinda thought he might be gay."

Buffy jerked her head up. "Huh? You thought that?"

"Hold still, dammit! Well, yeah, I did. He was just so Masterpiece Theater, and isn't most of English literature about the pain of being gay in a repressed country? Besides, I thought I saw him check out Mr. Miller's butt once."

"Mr. Miller? Our history teacher? I don't think he's Rupert's type."

*****

By the time Buffy was groomed within an inch of her life, the Scoobies had arrived. Cordelia went to check on the decorations while the bride dealt with her friends' questions. No one saw the brunette look back at the close-knit group with a certain regret in her eyes.

No one, that is, except Wesley when he found her adjusting a streamer here and a flower arrangement there. He placed his hands on her shoulders and drew her back toward him, kissing the top of her head.

"Penny for them?"

"For what?"

"Your thoughts, Cordelia. You seemed quite lost in them."

The girl shrugged. "It's not easy putting together a nice wedding on such short notice. I just want to make sure everything's right."

"It will be. And that isn't what this is all about is, it?"

"Then you tell me, Mr. Brainy; what is it all about?"

"You miss them, don't you?"

For a moment, Wesley thought she was going to ignore his question. She readjusted a perfectly squared tablecloth.

"Sometimes. Not always. But every once in a while, yeah. I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't want to go back to Sunnyhell or anything. Just...I felt like I was part of something then, y'know? I'm happy working for Angel and all, but I don't always feel like he lets us in. Especially lately. It's silly, I know, but it's how I feel."

"Oddly enough, I agree with you. We were both on the periphery of the group in the library, but I still felt more like a part of the team. Even with the mess I made of things there."

"Hey, you're not the only one who burned a few bridges. Do you think it will ever be the same with Angel?"

"At the rate things are going, I'd say it's fairly unlikely. Still, we do good work."

"Oh, yeah. Good work. Saving lives, saving souls. But y'know, that's almost kind of a letdown after you've saved the world a few times."

Wesley laughed. Cordelia glared at him. "I'm sorry, it's just even in our line of work, there aren't many people who could say that. It strikes me that we lead peculiar lives by our own standards."

"And that's really saying something, isn't it? Okay, everything here is as good as I can make it, so I'm going to make myself beautiful."

"Too late for that." Wesley ran his fingers across her cheek. "You're already ravishing." He kissed her deeply.

"You flatter me. Keep it up."

*****

Giles found himself somewhat at loose ends. He'd been unceremoniously evicted from his room so that Buffy, Willow, Tara, Joyce, and Anya could dress there. Anya in particular seemed concerned that he not get so much as a glimpse of Buffy.

And so it was that he and Xander were milling around the sitting room waiting for their chance to prepare themselves for the festivities.

"How long does it take women to get dressed? They've been in there over two hours." Giles was pacing nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's been a while since you shared a bathroom with one, hasn't it?"

Giles glared at the younger man.

"Hey, not that I need to know the answer to that one. It was just a guess. Besides, you're forgetting that there are five of them in there."

"What has that got to do with it?"

"Women physics. One woman gets dressed alone, it takes her maybe fifteen minutes, half an hour, depending on how Cordelia-like they are. But you start adding women, the time lengthens exponentially. Five women, add that it's for a wedding, we're looking at a minimum three and a half hours."

"But the wedding starts in forty-five minutes."

"Only if the bride and her entourage are ready. And face it, man, that has never once happened in the history of marriage. Plus it's Buffy who has, and I know this for a fact, never once been on time to anything in her entire life."

"But I'm not dressed for it. A-and all my things are in there. They'll blame it on me, you know." Giles ran a hand through his hair and flopped dejectedly into an easy chair.

"Now you're getting the picture. Not pretty, is it?"

"A bloody Jackson Pollack, if Buffy's to be believed."

*****

"Willow, it's beautiful. It's perfect! Rupert is gonna be totally non- verbal."

Buffy held the delicate satin and lace dress up to herself and stared into the mirror.

"But that would be a bad thing, wouldn't it? He has to be able to speak. To say the I do part, right?"

"It's okay, Anya. I'm sure he'll regain vocal control before then. But just in case, is anyone in here a ventriloquist?" Tara waited hopefully for the others to laugh. As usual, only Willow did. "Maybe I shouldn't have joked about that."

"No, Tara, it's okay. I'm just a little nervous is all."

"Honey, are you absolutely sure about this? It's not too late to call it off if you're not."

"Mom, no. The one thing I am sure about is that I want to marry Rupert. I know you're just doing the Mom thing and being all worried about me, but it's what I want. He's good for me, and I love him."

Joyce hugged her daughter, "Somehow, I knew that was what you were going to say. I just wish your father could be here to see you."

"Uh, Mom? Didn't he call you?"

"Call me? No. Why, did he call you?"

"He's sorta here. With his new wife."

The older woman's mouth set itself in a grim line of determination.

"Have you slayed him yet?"

"Nope. I've been a good girl. Rupert wouldn't let me kill him."

"Good. That means I get to do it."

*****

Cordelia passed the sitting room on her way to her room, but stopped in her tracks at the sight of Giles and Xander.

"What are you guys still doing in here? Why aren't you dressed yet?"

"The women have taken over the room he was planning on getting dressed in. Not to mention the room he was planning to shower and shave in."

"Thank you, Xander, I can answer a simple question myself you know. And Cordelia hardly needs the details of my ablutions."

"Okay, that sounded just plain dirty. I don't care how much you've been the poster child for old guys who don't need Viagra, Xander and I don't want to hear about your sex life."

"Speak for yourself, Miss Chase. I find myself strangely agog, in a really, really grossed out kind of way."

"I never bloody mentioned sex!"

Cordelia turned to her ex-boyfriend. "What's his saga?"

Xander shrugged. "Must be an English thing. So can we find the poor man someplace to change his clothes, etcetera?"

"No big. He can use my and Wesley's room. I'll get changed with Buffy."

"You and Wesley?"

"It's a long story. Actually, it isn't, but I don't feel like sharing with someone who's dating a demon girl."

"Hey! That's ex-demon girl to you."

"Whatever."


:: NEXT :: | :: CHRONICLES INDEX :: | :: AUTHORS PAGE ::